Friday, May 04, 2007

$65 Million for a Pair of Pants?

Wow....that's some pair of pants. Are they made of some rare material? Maybe they have gold, diamonds and other percious gems sewn on them? Maybe all of the above and worn by some famous person of history?

No, these pants are part of a suit owned by a Washington judge who dropped them off at a neighborhood cleaners for alteration. The pants somehow got separated and lost. I think the judge's mind must have been in the pants because I think he lost that, too. He's now suing the cleaners for $65,000,000. Yes, that's 65 MILLION DOLLARS.

We've all heard about suits filed by inmates because they were given creamy peanut butter instead of chunky (or was it the other way around?) and by people who were burned by coffee they didn't know would be hot and for lots of other reasons. And here we have a cleaners that lost something? How very unusual. That's never happened before in the annals of cleaners history.

I have no quarrell with this judge filing a lawsuit. He wasn't happy that his pants were lost in the first place and wasn't happy with the offers he got to satisfy him. Personally, I would have been happy to get the pants back, not to mention the monetary offers ($3,000, $4,000 and then $12,000 for pants from a suit worth $1000). But no, this judge thinks he deserves more.

Part of the lawsuit claims the rental of a car every weekend for 10 years to go to another cleaner. He thinks he's somehow entitled to a cleaner within blocks of his home, I guess. Would he have sued if this cleaner had closed down a year before this happened?

Now, to give him some quater in this suit, he claims he's filing under the consumer protection laws that fines violators $1,500 per violation, per day. Under his interpretation of the law, he's claiming 12 violations per day over 1200 days by three defendants. I'm not gonna do the math. Oh, who's kidding who? Of course I am, just cause I want to know. But wait! that comes up to $64,800,000. Maybe the other $200,000 is for the car rental? No, that's only $15,000. I guess he wants $185,000 for pain and suffering.

The lost pants? They were found about a week later. The judge says they aren't his. These pants are gray and his were blue and red pinstripes. The inseam matches his measurements, but more importantly, the ticket on the pants match his receipt.

This is a man who is up for a ten-year renewal to his administrative hearings position. Maybe there's a reason he thinks he won't be renewed and wants to insure his retirement. In my opinion, this is a clear cut case of abuse of the judicial system and the man should be ashamed of himself. Particularly because he is a judge and should be above this kind of action. As far as I'm concerned, his appointment should not be renewed, he should be laughed out of court and he should have to pay all costs of the filings.

Your Honor, you should be held in contempt of court for abuse of the legal system.

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