Irish Scones

Ingredients:

1 cup white flour
1/4 pound butter -- softened
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1 egg -- slightly beaten
2 ounces sugar
2 ounces milk Sultanas (white raisins) optional Walnut halves (optional)

Preparation:

Mix flour and baking powder. Add butter, and blend until the mixture is butter-colored. Add sugar and continue to mix well. Add half the beaten egg and all the milk. Add raisins or some nuts, if desired, mixing well to make a sticky dough. Turn dough onto floured board and knead for at least 5 minutes or longer. Cut dough into rounds and place on greased baking sheet or hot frying pan. Brush tops of scones with remainder of beaten egg. Place walnut halves on top, if desired. Bake at 350 to 375 degrees for about 15 to 20 minutes, or until brown. If preparing over an open fire, heat frying pan till very hot . Place scones in pan and cook for 7 to 8 minutes. Turn and cook for another 7 to 8 minutes.

Makes 6 scones.

Daylight Savings Time

begins in 15 days! Turn your clocks ahead 1 hour!

Gotta Love the Irish

Gallagher opened the morning newspaper and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend Finney.

"Did you see the paper?" asked Gallagher. "They say I died!!"

"Yes, I saw it!" replied Finney. "Where are ye callin' from?"

It's An Animal's Life

Now what do I do?

from email

Kid Friendly Irish Jokes

Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?
Because regular rocks are too heavy.

How did the Irish Jig get started?
Too much to drink and not enough restrooms.

How can you tell if an Irishman is having a good time?
He's Dublin over with laughter.

Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun?
Because they're always a little short.

Why did St. Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
He couldn't afford plane fare.

What's Irish and stays out all night?
Patty O'furniture!

When is an Irish Potato not an Irish Potato?
When it is a FRENCH fry.

Traditional Irish Breakfast

Ingredients :
8 slices of Shannon Traditional Irish Bacon (Premium)
4 Shannon Traditional Irish Sausages (Bangers)
4 slices of Shannon Traditional White Breakfast Pudding
4 slices of Shannon Traditional Black Breakfast Pudding
4 Medium size tomatoes
4 eggs Freshly ground pepper

Preparation :

Saute bacon over low heat, by turning frequently until done to taste. Remove from pan and drain on paper towels. Keep hot. It is important to keep in mind that Irish bacon is not cooked crisp hard. Place sausages in pan and cook until brown on all sides. Cut the tomatoes in half and fry with slices of pudding in the bacon fat. Remove and keep hot.

All the above items can also be boiled instead of being fried. Cook eggs to order.

Fun Beer Facts

What's St Patrick's Day without beer?

About 4000 years ago, it was the accepted practice in Babylonia that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer, and because their calender was lunar based, this period was called the "honey month" or what we know to day as the "Honey moon."

Before invention of the thermometer, brewers used to check the temperature by dipping their thumb, to find whether appropriate for adding Yeast. Too hot, the yeast would die. This is where we get the phrase " The Rule of the Thumb."

In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts. So in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender used to yell at themto mind their own pints and quarts and settle down. From where we get "mind your own P's and Q's".

After consuming a vibrant brew called Aul or Ale, the Vikings would go fearlessly to the battlefield, without their armour, or even their shirts. The "Berserk" means "bear shirt" in norse, and eventually to the meaning of wild battles.

Way back in 1740, the Admiral Veron of the British fleet decided to water down the navy's rum, which naturally, the sailors weren't pleased with. They nicknamed the Admiral Old Grog, after the still stiff grogram coats he used to wear. The term grog soon began to mean the watered down drink itself. When you are drunk on this this grog, you are "groggy", a word still in use.

Long ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim of their beer mugs or ceremic/glass cups. The whistle was used to order services. Thus we get the phrase, "wet your whistle".

The Holiday Spot

Danny

Oh Danny boy, the pipes the pipes are calling,

From glen to glen and on the mountainside.

The summer's gone and all the leaves are falling,

'Tis you must go, 'tis you must go and I must bide!

But come you back, when summer's in the meadow,

Or when the valley's hush and white with snow!

Then I'll be there in sunshine or in shadow,

Oh Danny Boy, Oh Danny Boy, I love you so!

And if you come, when all the flowers are dying

And I am dead, as dead I well may be

You'll come and find the place where I am lying

And kneel and say an "Ave" there for me.

And I shall hear, tho' soft you tread above me

And all my dreams will warm and sweeter be

If you'll not fail to tell me that you love me

I simply sleep in peace until you come to me.

Oh Danny Boy, Oh Danny Boy, I love you so!

The Holiday Spot

AN IRISH FRIENDSHIP WISH

May there always be work for your hands to do;

May your purse always hold a coin or two;

May the sun always shine on your windowpane;

May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain;

May the hand of a friend always be near you;

May God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you

An Irish Blessing

May the road rise to meet you.

May the wind be always at your back.

May the sun shine warm upon your face.

And rains fall soft upon your fields.

And until we meet again,

May God hold you in the hollow of His hand.

Gotta Love the Irish

Paddy was in New York He was patiently waiting, and watching the traffic cop on a busy street crossing. The cop stopped the flow of traffic and shouted, "Okay pedestrians". Then he'd allow the traffic to pass.

He'd done this several times, and Paddy still stood on the sidewalk. After the cop had shouted "Pedestrians" for the tenth time, Paddy went over to him and said, "Is it not about time ye let the Catholics across?"

Irish Boiled Dinner

Ingredients:

4 pounds brisket corned beef1 clove garlic, minced

1 bay leaf

1 can onion soup

4 whole peppercorns

6 medium potatoes, quartered

1/2 cup celery cut into 1" pieces

1/4 teaspoon rosemary, crushed

6 medium carrots, cut into 1" pieces

1 medium green cabbage, cut into wedges

3 tablespoons flour

3 tablespoons water

Preparation:

Rinse corned beef and place in large heavy pan. Add soup and seasonings. Cover and cook over low heat for 3-1/2 hours. Add potatoes, carrots and celery. Place cabbage on top and cover. Cook for about 1 hour or until everything is tender. Remove meat, vegetables and bay leaf. Gradually blend water into flour until smooth. Slowly stir into sauce. Stir and cook until thickened.

St. Patrick's Day

Did You Know?

from The History Channel

- There are 34 million U.S. residents who claim Irish ancestry. This number is almost nine times the population of Ireland itself (3.9 million). Irish is the nation’s second most frequently reported ancestry, trailing only German.

- There are three states in which Irish is the leading ancestry group: Delaware, Massachusetts and New Hampshire. Irish is among the top five ancestries in every state but two (Hawaii and New Mexico).

- There are 54 counties where Irish is the largest observed ancestry group. Forty-four of these counties are in the Northeast, with 14 in New York, 11 in Massachusetts and five in New Jersey.

- In Middlesex County, Mass., 348,978 residents are of Irish ancestry. Among the 54 counties where Irish is the largest observed ancestry group, Middlesex had the highest population of Irish-Americans, with Norfolk County, Mass., second, with 203,285.

- A total of 4.8 million immigrants from Ireland have been admitted to the U.S. for lawful permanent residence since fiscal year 1820, the earliest year for which official immigration records exist. By fiscal year 1870, about half of these immigrants were admitted for lawful permanent residence. Only Germany, Italy, the United Kingdom and Mexico have had more immigrants admitted for permanent residence to the United States than Ireland.

- The value of U.S. imports from the Republic of Ireland during a recent 10-month period (January-October 2004) was $23 billion. Meanwhile, the United States exported $6.6 billion worth of goods to Ireland.

- There are nine places in the United States that share the name of Ireland’s capital, Dublin. Since Census 2000, Dublin, Calif., has surpassed Dublin, Ohio, as the most populous of these places (35,581 compared with 33,606 as of July 1, 2003).

Data courtesy of the U.S. Census Bureau

Gotta Love the Irish

O'Toole worked in the lumber yard for twenty years and all that time he'd been stealing the wood and selling it. At last his conscience began to bother him and he went to confession to repent.

"Father, it's 15 years since my last confession, and I've been stealing wood from the lumber yard all those years," he told the priest.

"I understand my son," says the priest. " Can you make a Novena?"

O'Toole said, "Father, if you have the plans, I've got the lumber."

Corned Beef Brisket Recipe

Ingredients :
1 (8-10 lb) beef brisket
4 garlic cloves, peeled and cut in thirds The Brine
1/2 cup white vinegar
4 tablespoons sugar
2 quarts water 1 cup kosher salt
3 bay leaves
1/2 teaspoon mustard seeds
1 pinch ground cloves
1 teaspoon peppercorns
The Simmering Liquid
water, to come up 3/4 to side of brisket
1/2 teaspoon whole allspice
1/4 teaspoon whole cloves
1 teaspoon peppercorns
1/2 teaspoon mustard seeds
4 garlic cloves, sliced

Preparation:

Combine all of the brine ingredients and bring to a boil, then cool. Place the beef brisket, the cooled brine, and the 4 garlic cloves in a huge plastic roasting bag. Make sure that all of the meat is covered by the brine, tie off tightly, place in a pot large enough to hold it all, and refrigerate for 6 to 7 days, turning occasionally. After the 6 to 7 days, discard the brine after removing the brisket from the brine. The meat should be thoroughly rinsed and then placed in a Dutch oven or other large pot. Add enough water to come up 2/3 to 3/4 of the way up the side of the meat. Add the rest of the Simmering Liquid ingredients (peppercorns, mustard seeds, allspice, cloves and garlic), bring to a boil and skim off any foam. Reduce heat to a low simmer and cook, covered, for at least 3 hours.

6-8 servings.

May God Have Mercy on Him

SARASOTA, Fla. (AP) - A former mechanic convicted of raping and murdering 11-year-old Carlie Brucia, whose abduction was caught on a car wash security camera, was sentenced to death Wednesday for her murder.

The jury that convicted Joseph P. Smith recommended that he be executed, and the judge agreed. Smith, 39, showed no emotion Wednesday as Judge Andrew Owens read the official sentence.

Last month, Smith had tearfully apologized during a hearing, saying: "I take responsibility of my crimes. I don't understand how this could have happened. ... Every day I think about what I did and beg God for forgiveness."

He said he had taken heroin and cocaine in an attempt to kill himself before he abducted Carlie in 2004. Smith said he didn't remember much about that day and asked Owens to spare him for the sake of his family. His attorney, Adam Tebrugge, argued that Smith could lead a productive life in prison and be a positive influence on his three daughters if he was spared.

Owens discounted those arguments Wednesday. He said Carlie suffered "unspeakable terror and physical suffering" at Smith's hands.

Carlie's body was found four days after her disappearance on the grounds of a Sarasota church. News of the crime shook the community, and hundreds turned out for memorial services.

Carlie's stepfather, Steven Kansler, buried his face in his hands as Owens read details of the crimes before sentencing Smith.

"I thought I'd feel a lot different," Kansler said afterward. "But it still hurts. It doesn't change anything. I just feel that Carlie has been heard. Her soul is gone now. Now it's just a matter of time to wait to watch Joe Smith die."

Absent from the courtroom was Carlie's mother, Susan Schorpen, who is in jail in Pinellas County on drug and prostitution charges. She has said the pain of losing her daughter led her to institutionalize herself three times and take drugs to numb the pain.

St Patrick's Day

The History of the Holiday

from The History Channel

The First Parade

St. Patrick's Day is celebrated on March 17, his religious feast day and the anniversary of his death in the fifth century. The Irish have observed this day as a religious holiday for thousands of years.

On St. Patrick's Day, which falls during the Christian season of Lent, Irish families would traditionally attend church in the morning and celebrate in the afternoon. Lenten prohibitions against the consumption of meat were waived and people would dance, drink, and feast—on the traditional meal of Irish bacon and cabbage.

The first St. Patrick's Day parade took place not in Ireland, but in the United States. Irish soldiers serving in the English military marched through New York City on March 17, 1762. Along with their music, the parade helped the soldiers to reconnect with their Irish roots, as well as fellow Irishmen serving in the English army.

Over the next thirty-five years, Irish patriotism among American immigrants flourished, prompting the rise of so-called "Irish Aid" societies, like the Friendly Sons of Saint Patrick and the Hibernian Society. Each group would hold annual parades featuring bagpipes (which actually first became popular in the Scottish and British armies) and drums.

No Irish Need Apply

Up until the mid-nineteenth century, most Irish immigrants in America were members of the Protestant middle class. When the Great Potato Famine hit Ireland in 1845, close to a million poor, uneducated, Catholic Irish began to pour into America to escape starvation. Despised for their religious beliefs and funny accents by the American Protestant majority, the immigrants had trouble finding even menial jobs. When Irish Americans in the country 's cities took to the streets on St. Patrick's Day to celebrate their heritage, newspapers portrayed them in cartoons as drunk, violent monkeys.

However, the Irish soon began to realize that their great numbers endowed them with a political power that had yet to be exploited. They started to organize, and their voting block, known as the "green machine," became an important swing vote for political hopefuls. Suddenly, annual St. Patrick's Day parades became a show of strength for Irish Americans, as well as a must-attend event for a slew of political candidates. In 1948, President Truman attended New York City 's St. Patrick's Day parade, a proud moment for the many Irish whose ancestors had to fight stereotypes and racial prejudice to find acceptance in America.

Wearing of the Green Goes Global

Today, St. Patrick's Day is celebrated by people of all backgrounds in the United States, Canada, and Australia. Although North America is home to the largest productions, St. Patrick's Day has been celebrated in other locations far from Ireland, including Japan, Singapore, and Russia.

In modern-day Ireland, St. Patrick's Day has traditionally been a religious occasion. In fact, up until the 1970s, Irish laws mandated that pubs be closed on March 17. Beginning in 1995, however, the Irish government began a national campaign to use St. Patrick's Day as an opportunity to drive tourism and showcase Ireland to the rest of the world. Last year, close to one million people took part in Ireland 's St. Patrick's Festival in Dublin, a multi-day celebration featuring parades, concerts, outdoor theater productions, and fireworks shows.

Gotta Love the Irish

Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and says to the first man he meets, "Do you want to go to heaven?"

The man said, "I do Father."

The priest said, "Then stand over there against the wall."

Then the priest asked the second man, "Do you want to go to heaven?"

"Certainly, Father," was the man's reply.

"Then stand over there against the wall," said the priest.

Then Father Murphy walked up to O'Toole and said, "Do you want to go to heaven?

O'Toole said, "No, I don't Father

The priest said, "I don't believe this. You mean to tell me that when you die you don't want to go to heaven?"

O'Toole said, "Oh, when I die, yes. I thought you were getting a group together to go right now."

In Honor of Stupid People . . . Part 4

Actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On packaging for a Rowenta iron --

"Do not iron clothes on body."

(but wouldn't this save me time?)

"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."

(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year olds with head colds off those bulldozers.)

More to follow

Lemon-Irish Whiskey Cake Recipe

Ingredients : Ideally this recipe should be started the day before baking.

1 lemon, zest of, cut into julienne

3/4 cup superfine sugar (regular sugar can be processed in a blender of food processor)

3 eggs, beaten

1/4 cup Irish whiskey

3/4 cup butter, at room temperature

2 cups flour

3/4 cup almonds, ground

1 pinch salt

Preparation:

Place julienned lemon zest in a small bowl. Let it soak in whiskey overnight. The next day, preheat oven to 350°F .Grease a 9 inch cake pan. Cream the butter and sugar together until light and fluffy and then whisk in the eggs. Sift the flour and add to the butter mixture together with the salt. Stir to blend. Fold in the ground almonds. Strain the whiskey, discarding the zest, and stir the whiskey into the batter. Pour into the prepared pan, and bake for about one hour, until golden brown, and a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.

10 servings

Unicorn

A long time ago when the Earth was green,

There was more kinds of animals then you've ever seen.

And they'd run around free while the world was being born.

The loveliest of all was the Unicorn!

There was green alligators and long necked geese,

Hump back camels and chimpanzees.

Cats and rats and elephants but sure a you're born,

The loveliest of all was the Unicorn!

But the Lord seen some sinnin' and it caused him pain.

He says, "Stand back, I'm gonna make it rain.

So hey, Brother Noah, I'll tell you what to do.

Go and build me a floating zoo."

"You'll take two alligators and a couple of geese,

Two hump back camels and two chimpanzees.

Two cats, two rats, two elephants but as sure as you're born,

Noah, don't you forget my unicorns!"

Well, Noah looked out through the drivin' rain,

But the unicorns was hidin'-playin' silly games.

They were kickin' and a-splashin' while the rain was pourin',

Oh them foolish unicorns.

"So you take two alligators and a couple of geese,

Two hump back camels and two chimpanzees.

Two cats, two rats, two elephants but as sure as you're born,

Noah, don't you forget my unicorns."

And the the ark started movin' and it drifted with the tide,

And the unicorns looked up from the rock and cried.

And the water came up and sort of floated them away,

That's why you've never seen a unicorn to this day.

You'll see a lot of alligators and a whole mess of geese,

You'll see hump back camels and chimpanzees.

You'll see cats and rats and elephants but as sure as you're born,

You're never gonna see no unicorn.

The Holiday Spot

Gotta Love the Irish

Being of Irish descent myself, I love Irish jokes.

Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place.

Looking up to heaven he said, "Lord take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life, and Give up me Irish Whiskey."

Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

Paddy looked up again and said, "Never mind, I found one."

Who Was St. Patrick?

from The History Channel

St. Patrick, the patron saint of Ireland, is one of Christianity's most widely known figures. But for all his celebrity, his life remains somewhat of a mystery. Many of the stories traditionally associated with St. Patrick, including the famous account of his banishing all the snakes from Ireland, are false, the products of hundreds of years of exaggerated storytelling.

Taken Prisoner By Irish Raiders

It is known that St. Patrick was born in Britain to wealthy parents near the end of the fourth century. He is believed to have died on March 17, around 460 A.D. Although his father was a Christian deacon, it has been suggested that he probably took on the role because of tax incentives and there is no evidence that Patrick came from a particularly religious family. At the age of sixteen, Patrick was taken prisoner by a group of Irish raiders who were attacking his family's estate. They transported him to Ireland where he spent six years in captivity. (There is some dispute over where this captivity took place. Although many believe he was taken to live in Mount Slemish in County Antrim, it is more likely that he was held in County Mayo near Killala.) During this time, he worked as a shepherd, outdoors and away from people. Lonely and afraid, he turned to his religion for solace, becoming a devout Christian. (It is also believed that Patrick first began to dream of converting the Irish people to Christianity during his captivity.)

Guided By Visions

After more than six years as a prisoner, Patrick escaped. According to his writing, a voice—which he believed to be God's—spoke to him in a dream, telling him it was time to leave Ireland.

To do so, Patrick walked nearly 200 miles from County Mayo, where it is believed he was held, to the Irish coast. After escaping to Britain, Patrick reported that he experienced a second revelation—an angel in a dream tells him to return to Ireland as a missionary. Soon after, Patrick began religious training, a course of study that lasted more than fifteen years. After his ordination as a priest, he was sent to Ireland with a dual mission—to minister to Christians already living in Ireland and to begin to convert the Irish. (Interestingly, this mission contradicts the widely held notion that Patrick introduced Christianity to Ireland.)

Bonfires and Crosses

Familiar with the Irish language and culture, Patrick chose to incorporate traditional ritual into his lessons of Christianity instead of attempting to eradicate native Irish beliefs. For instance, he used bonfires to celebrate Easter since the Irish were used to honoring their gods with fire. He also superimposed a sun, a powerful Irish symbol, onto the Christian cross to create what is now called a Celtic cross, so that veneration of the symbol would seem more natural to the Irish. (Although there were a small number of Christians on the island when Patrick arrived, most Irish practiced a nature-based pagan religion. The Irish culture centered around a rich tradition of oral legend and myth. When this is considered, it is no surprise that the story of Patrick's life became exaggerated over the centuries—spinning exciting tales to remember history has always been a part of the Irish way of life. )

Flying High

It takes a college degree to fly a plane but only a high school diploma to fix one: a reassurance for those of us who fly routinely in our jobs.

After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe sheet," which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor.

Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' Pilots(marked with a P) and the Solutions Recorded (marked with an S) By Maintenance Engineers.

By the way, Qantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident.

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're for.

P: IFF inoperative
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny. (I love this one!)
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

And The Best One For Last!!

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel . Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.

I'VE LEARNED...

A good friend will come bail you out of jail....But a true friend will be sitting next to you saying "Damn! That was fun!"

I've learned...that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I've learned...that we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.

I've learned...that money doesn't buy class.

I've learned...that it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

I've learned...that under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I've learned...that the Lord didn't do it all in one day. What makes me think I can?

I've learned...that to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

I've learned...that the less time I have to work, the more things I get done.

HAPPY FRIENDSHIP WEEK TO YOU!!!!!!

YOU ARE MY FRIEND AND I am honored

from email. Slightly edited, but otherwise intact

DID YOU KNOW?

Patrick Henry, that patriot and Founding Father of our country said:

"It cannot be emphasized too strongly or too often that this great nation was founded not by religionists but by Christians, not on religions but on the Gospel of Jesus Christ".

Part 6

A GREAT RECIPE

Fold two hands together, And express a dash of sorrow.

Marinate it overnight, And work on it tomorrow.

Chop one grudge in tiny pieces, Add several cups of love. D

redge with a large sized smile, Mix with the ingredients above.

Dissolve the hate within you, By doing a good deed.

Cut in and help your friend, If he/she should be in need.

Stir in laughter, love and kindness, From the heart it has to come.

Toss with genuine forgiveness, And give your friends some.

The amount of people served, Will depend on you.

It can serve the whole wide world. If you really want it to!!!

author unknown