Christmas Bells

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

I heard the bells, on Christmas Day,

Their old, familiar carols play,

And wild and sweet

The words repeat

Of peace on earth,

good will to men.

And Yet More Christmas Jokes

Why did the elf push his bed into the fireplace? He wanted to sleep like a log.

How do Mexican sheep say Merry Christmas? "Fleece Navidad."

Someone has stated that the three phrases that best sum up the Christmas season are:

Peace on Earth

Goodwill to Men

Batteries not included

Who delivers Christmas presents to dogs? Santa Paws

If Santa rode a motorcycle, what kind would it be? A Holly Davidson, of course!

Christmas Programming for December 10

11:00 AM Angel in the Family Hallmark
12:00 PM I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus Family
1:00 PM The Christmas Gift Hallmark
3:00 PM Winning Holiday Cookies Food
5:00 PM Paula's southern Christmas Food
6:00 PM Gingerbread Championships Food
11:00 PM The Christmas Gift Hallmark

Check local listings for changes and other programming

Handmade Ornaments

Learn to trim your tree without delving too far into your bank account! Handmade ornaments can look beautiful on a tree. Here are some easy ideas:

Cut stars out of cardboard (leftover cereal boxes work very well), cover with silver paper and hang with pretty ribbons.

Make gingerbread men to hang from your tree - be sure to poke a hole in the top of his head for the hook!

Borrow a book on origami from the library and start folding! This ancient art is easy to do and the results are simply beautiful.

Christmas Programming for December 9

12:00 AM Emeril's Holiday Cookie Contest Food
1:00 AM Winning Holiday Cookies Food
3:00 AM Gingerbread Championships Food
4:00 PM One Special Night Lifetime
7:00 PM I'll Be Home for Christmas Lifetime
8:00 PM Emeril: Hilda's Holiday Classic Food
8:00 PM Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer Toon
8:00 PM I Want a Dog for Christmas Charlie Brown! ABC
8:00 PM Prancer Family
9:00 PM Angel in the Family Hallmark
9:00 PM Eve's Christmas Lifetime
10:00 PM Al roker's Christmas in New York Food

Check local listings for changes and other programming

Do give books - religious or otherwise - for Christmas. They're never fattening, seldom sinful, and permanently personal.

- - - Lenore Hershey

Christmas Programming for December 8

12:00 AM Emeril's Holiday Food Gift Ideas Food
7:00 PM The Man Upstairs Lifetime
8:00 PM Christmas Castles ABC
8:00 PM Emeril's Holiday Cookie Contest Food
8:00 PM I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus Family
9:00 PM One Special Night Lifetime
9:00 PM Winning Holiday Cookies Food
11:00 PM Gingerbread Championships Food
12:00 AM Christmas Cookies Food

Check local listings for changes and other programming

The Three Wise Men

In a small Southern town there was a "Nativity Scene" that showed great skill and talent had gone into creating it. One small feature bothered me. The three wise men were wearing firemen's helmets. Totally unable to come up with a reason or explanation, I left.

At a "Quick Stop" on the edge of town, I asked the lady behind the counter about the helmets. She exploded into a rage, yelling at me, "You Yankees never do read the Bible!" I assured her that I did, but simply couldn't recall anything about firemen in the Bible.

She jerked her Bible from behind the counter and ruffled through some pages, and finally jabbed her finger at a passage. Sticking it in my face she said, "See, it says right here, 'The three wise man came from afar.'"

Found at Boortz.com

May you have ...

The gladness of Christmas which is hope;

The spirit of Christmas which is peace;

The heart of Christmas which is love.

- - - Ada V. Hendricks

More Christmas Jokes...

What does Santa like best about gardening? He loves to Ho, Ho, Hoe!

Which elf sings "Love me tender?" Santa's little Elvis!

Scrooge loves all the reindeer equally, because every buck is dear to him.

Santa's sleigh jingles too much. He won't win the No Bell Prize!

Does Santa have any money? No. That is why they call him Saint Nickeless.

Why does Santa like to go down chimneys? Because it soots him!

Christmas Programming for December 7

1:00 AM Gingerbread Championships Food
7:00 PM Crazy for Christmas Lifetime
8:00 PM A Charlie Brown Christmas ABC
8:00 PM Emeril's Holiday Food Gift Ideas Food
8:00 PM Santa Claus is Comin' to Town Family
8:00 PM The Night B4 Christmas Toon
8:00 PM The White House Christmas 2005 HGTV
9:00 PM A Town Without Christmas Lifetime
9:00 PM Life Father, Like Santa Lifetime
9:00 PM Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer and the Island of Misfit Toys Family
9:00 PM The Christmas Gift Hallmark

Check local listings for changes and other programming

Up On the Housetop

Up on the housetop reindeer pause,
Out jumps good old Santa Claus.
Down thru' the chimneywith lots of toys,
All for the little ones, Christmas joys.

Ho, ho, ho! Who wouldn't go!
Ho, ho, ho! Who wouldn't go!
Up on the housetop, click, click, click,
Down thru' the chimney with good Saint Nick.

First comes the stocking of little Nell,
Oh, dear Santa fill it well;
Give her a dollythat laughs and cries
One that will open and shut her eyes.

Ho, ho, ho! Who wouldn't go!
Ho, ho, ho! Who wouldn't go!
Up on the housetop, click, click, click,
Down thru' the chimney with good Saint Nick.

Next comes the stocking of little Will,
Oh just see what a glorious fill
Here is a hammer and lots of tacks,
Also a ball and a whip that cracks.

Ho, ho, ho! Who wouldn't go!
Ho, ho, ho! Who wouldn't go!
Up on the housetop, click, click, click,
Down thru' the chimney with good Saint Nick.

I will honor Christmas in my heart and try to keep it all the year.

- - - Charles Dickens "A Christmas Carol"

Christmas Programming for December 6

2:00 AM Emeril's Christmas Party Food
1:00 AM Christmas Cookies Food
1:30 AM Holidays Food
8:00 PM Chasing Christmas Family
9:00 PM Gingerbread Championships Food
9:00 PM Life Father, Like Santa Lifetime
9:00 PM One Christmas Hallmark
10:00 PM 20 Merriest Christmas Moments CMT
10:00 PM Chasing Christmas Family

Check your local listings for changes and other programming.

Let Us Keep Christmas

Whatever else be lost among the years, Let us keep Christmas still a shining thing; Whatever doubts assail us, or what fears, Let us hold close one day, remembering it's poignant meaning for the hearts of men. Let us get back our childlike faith again.

- - - Grace Noll Crowell

Christmas Programing for December 5

1:00 AM Holiday Inn AMC
1:00 AM Holiday Windows HGTV
1:00 AM Paula's Southern Christmas Food
2:00 AM Gingerbread Championships Food
7:00 PM On the 2nd Day of Christmas Lifetime
8:00 PM Emeril's Christmas Party Food
8:00 PM Jack Frost Family
8:00 PM Mickey's Twice Upon a Christmas Disney
9:00 PM A Christmas Visitor Hallmark
9:00 PM Recipe for a Perfect Christmas Lifetime
9:00 PM Unwrapped Christmas Cookies Food
12:00 AM Unwrapped Holidays Food
10 00 PM The Secret Life of … Food

Check your local listings for changes and other programming.

The Ecosystem Goes Nuts Once Again

This is off the Christmas topic, but it does annoy me. As I've stated before, this blog is part of the Truth Laid Bear Ecosystem. This morning I was ranked as a Large Mammal with a ranking in the 400's (sorry can't remember the exact number, somewhere around 471). This evening, I've dropped to 3234 as a Flappy Bird. That's a heck of a drop in one day.

As I've said before, it doesn't make any difference in the grand scheme of things, but these ups and downs are making me seasick!

God Rest You Merry, Gentlemen

Dinah Maria Mulock Craik

God rest you merry, gentlemen,
Let nothing you dismay,
For Jesus Christ, our Saviour,
Was born upon this day,
To save us all from Satan's power
When we were gone astray.
O tidings of comfort and joy!
For Jesus Christ, our Saviour,
Was born on Christmas Day.

Christmas Programming for December 4

4:00 PM Paula's Southern Christmas Food
7:00 PM The Night They Saved Christmas Hallmark
8:00 PM Chasing Christmas Family
8:00 PM Crazy for Christmas Lifetime
8:00 PM Holiday Inn AMC
9:00 PM A Season For Miracles Hallmark
9:00 PM Holiday Windows HGTV
9:00 PM Paula's Southern Christmas Food
10:00 PM Gingerbread Championships Food
10:15 PM Entertainment Weekly's Best Holiday Movies AMC
11:15 PM A Christmas Carol AMC

Check your local listings for changes and other programming.