The Procedure

I now know, if there was any question, that a liquid fast isn't really something I want to do again. I've thought a few times that a one-day liquid fast once or twice a month might be good to detoxify my system. Not to mention weight loss. Well, I was wrong. I like the texture of food too much. Yesterday, I could drink as much as I wanted to fill me up, but I found that liquids only last for so long. Then I'm hungry again and also have the need to chew on something, anything? I couldn't have anything by mouth after midnight - eight hours and a bit prior to "The Procedure" (ba-da-dum-bum-dummm!).

I was scheduled to be at the Surgical Center at 8:15 this morning. I got up at my usual time, showered and dressed to be ready for my colonoscopy, herein after referred to as "The Procedure." My instructions were not to wear perfume, makeup, jewelry or clothing that was not easy to get in and out of. We got to the Surgical Center on time but had to wait to be checked in (of course!), and then we had to wait until they were ready for me (of course!).

Finally, my name was called and I went into the Pre-Op area. My Other Half had to wait in the waiting room until I was prepped. Good thing. There was barely enough room in the prep area for the bed and me. My glasses were put into a bin under the bed and I was instructed to take off my clothes and get into the lovely backless ensemble I was given (I was allowed to keep to keep my socks on). I climbed into the bed. Diane, my prep nurse, introduced herself as she hooked me up to a blood-pressure cuff (which tried periodically to squeeze my arm off). Diane then prepared my hand for the IV where the anesthesia would be introduced. She said there would be a "bite" and a "sting" as she numbed my hand for the IV. She was right. Ouch! Thanks to the numbing, I never felt the needle go into my hand even though Diane said I'd feel some pressure. My Other Half was finally allowed to come back and sit with me until they took me into the room where "The Procedure" would be done.

When I was rolled into the procedure room, I was told to turn onto my left side and instructed on how to place my legs (the right one bent and the left straight) and given padding where my hands and right leg touched the railings. When the doctor got there I was asked (for about the tenth time) my name, my doctor's name, and the procedure. Everyone was on the same page and agreed that everyone was there for the same reason - to do "The Procedure".

I saw the anesthesiologist start the plunger that contained the anesthesia. That was all I saw until I woke up about an hour later. It could have been thirty minutes, for all I really know, I didn't have my watch on. I was a little disoriented, but still alert. The anesthesia wore off quickly. Too quickly. I wanted to use it as an excuse for whatever silly or dumb thing I was likely to do or say during the day.

The doctor came in and told me that everything went fine. I have a couple of little hemorroids and a polyp which they cut out. His office will call me in a week or so and give me the results.

I had told My Other Half yesterday that at whatever time we left the Surgical Center, we were going to find someplace to eat. I wanted solid food and I didn't really care (too much) what it was as long as it was solid! The time would be the deciding factor whether it was breakfast, lunch or dinner. We were out early enough for a late breakfast and we went in search of Denny's or IHOP. IHOP was closest so that's where we went.

They had forgotten to warn me about the gas I would experience. I had read the literature so I new that they pumped some air in during "The Procedure" so I was prepared for that. I was so glad that we weren't seated near anyone else during breakfast. I did indeed so enjoy my breakfast of eggs, bacon, and hash browns. Carbs be damned! Tomorrow, we'll get back on track and watch our carbs the way we should (My Other Half is diabetic so he has to watch them all the time). We'll start to exercise and be more mindful of our health. And do all the other things responsible adults do.

Being a grown up can be the pits!