A Couple Going Out for the Evening

They'd gotten ready, all dolled up, put the dog out etc.

The taxi arrives, and as the couple start out, the dog shoots back in the house. They don't want the dog shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the dog out.

The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver, "He's just going up stairs to say goodbye to my mother."

A few minutes later the husband gets into the cab. "Sorry I took so long" he says, "Stupid bitch was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching and biting me as I hauled her ass downstairs and tossed her in the back yard! She better not shit in the vegetable garden again!"